My wife and I just moved to Clayton from New York where we just moved into a new house. We are confused on what the legal age is to leave a child home alone for an hour as we debate after school care. The only thing we have found so far is that there is no legal age for a child, for the parents to base it strictly on maturity. Our nine year old son will turn ten in December and we feel he is quite mature to handle being home alone after school. If anyone could provide any futher information to clarify and offer their opinions on the age, we would surely appreciate it! Jack and Suzy
I'm sure I was that age when I started staying home alone, but with the way things are this day in time, I think afterschool care would be best if you can afford it, or atleast meet some neighbors and maybe have one look out for him in the afternoons..
Mature or not, I feel he is still too young to be by himself. Can he hang out with a neighbor or a friend from school. I know you didn't ask for my opinion but you can never fully trust a kid at that age. They can get really bored and get into trouble real fast. Ro
I think that ONLY YOU know your son and what he is capable of doing and his maturity level. And the decision is totally yours. I have decided mine will go home alone this year, for the first time.
My opinion is, if you believe your kids are old enough, then so be it. I think I was eight or so when I was charged with getting myself up and ready for school in the morning and came home to a list of chores to have done before my parents got home from work. Of course that was for<cough>ty odd years ago. But, if something happens, do not try blaming anyone but yourself. My suggestion, though, is to call child services (or whatever they are called here) and get an official ruling on the age. If anyone would know, they would.
my friend has a 11 year old daughter and just went thru this with her ex husband. She called the state 2 times and was told there is no age limit in NC but it is based on a maturity level and if the child is mature enough to be alone. Per the state of NC.... So if they know to stay inside, what to do in an emergency and can do things for their self then legally per the 2 ladies with the state then they are ok. so like KT said... you know your children well enough to that question!! and since you are smart enough to ask then you probably feel confident in their abilities.
Are you serious?? Surely there must be SOME age restriction. Otherwise, you could leave your 4yo home alone. I thought I saw a thread on this here several months back.
My wife called child services to ask them. After being transferred around alot, she did speak to one woman who told us there was no age, just go on maturity of the child. She gave some suggestions on emergency phone lists, who to contact, have the child call when they walk through the door, how to work an alarm system if there is one (we are having one installed tomorrow). So I know it's LEGAL for him to stay home at that age, just wanted to hear some voiced opinions. He will only be home between 45 minutes to an hour. We just don't feel that spending a couple of hundred dollars a month on after school care for such a short period of time would be worth it. This way, he can come home concentrate on his studies and we will be home in time to help him complete his homework. The lady at child services told us many children stay home as early as eight years old and in the third grade.
AMEN to that!! Also, they have to learn responsibility. Just an example, my two 11 year olds are staying home, alone, this whole week before school. I left them a list of things to do yesterday, one of which was 'unload the dishwasher'....they told me at the dinner table last night, 'Mom thanks for letting us unload the dishwasher, now we know where everything goes.' Mission accomplished.
I didn't allow mine to stay home alone until age 12. My 10 yo won't be allowed to get off the bus by herself until 6th grade, and then my 9th grader will be home to watch her.
My 11 yo son stays home by himself. He is a good kid and knows all the rules b/c his insane mother has drilled them into his head (I play a recording while he sleeps). We have 3 neighbors that are home during the day and they are all on alert. Like the majority said.....you know your child better than anyone.
ding ding ding ain't that the truth! I'm lucky too, because my best friend lives across the street and she is a SAHM, so she keeps an eye on the house, etc. If the girls fall and get a boo boo, etc. they run to her. I also have two other neighbors that stay home too, so there are always watchful eyes around. :mrgreen:
That also applies to our child. We have several stay at home mom's around us who said they would not mind keeping an eye on the house and being on alert. My wife had a great idea, to do a videotape drill for our son. Walk him from his bustop to our house (which is right out front) and unlock the door, lock the door, work the alarm, etc. Even set up situations on what to do if he comes home to the front door being open a crack, showing us where the emergency phone numbers are, where his snacks are, what to do if someone calls (we will call from a cell phone just to set up the situation), what to do if someone knocks, etc. We thought this form of roleplay will show him the situation first hand and how to react to it. By videotaping it, we can review it every night for a week just so it is drilled into his head! Plus, what kid does not like watching himself on TV, acting! Jack
Very serious!! I was surprised when they said that but understood when they explained that some 11 year olds are not mature at all and som 9 year olds are more mature then 15 year olds... I mean they need to be able to communicate, react in an emergency, know how to prepare a snack and things like that (and use the bathroom on their own LOL) But that was the law in NC.... :?
My fear with the "its just for an hour" solution is what happens when something goes wrong and you are stuck in traffic, or a flat tire?? or if something major goes wrong at home... My son is 11 and would do great if everything went right, it is when things go wrong that I worry about. When my daughter was 12 I left her for a few hours. She called me panicked. She said "I know you said not to let anyone in the house but the their are several fire trucks in the front yard and they are banging on the door" Apparently our security system was malfunctioning and called the fire department. I still use a babysitter when needed. It seems like a waste of money, but God forbid anything went wrong, I would give (or pay) anything to undo my decision, I think of it like insurance!!! Good luck, it is a tough choice.
I thought there was something on here not too long ago too, bc it was about someone calling the state on a single dad( i think ) that was leaving several kids home alone during the day and the neighbors were calling and complaining????
