Reading obituaries - one of my favorite parts of the daily paper

There was a young lady named Sharkey
Who had an affair with a darkey.
The result of her sins
Was quadruplets, not twins,
One white, and one black, and two khaki.

 

I read them daily also. I am very curious as to what people die of at such young ages. It breaks your heart to see how young some of these people are. Was it cancer, car accident, heart attack, murder, suicide., etc. But it is so great to see also how old some people live to, and you get to wonder what they did to live that long. And then after reading the obits, you feel real bad for all the families...

 

Now tit for Tat would be hard to beat.
But you forgot about her husband the cheat
He was with all the girls in town,
Spreading his manliness around.
Til his junk fell off onto his feet.

 

Mary had a little lamb
Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her,
Between two hunks of bread.

 

Same here, it's my curiosity andIalwasy get stuck on the young ones. I really like the pictures of the elderly in their heyday.

 

:iagree:

 

oh my God, this is too funny!!!

 

Back to work I must go.
Playing on the internet makes the day go slow
I’ll leave you with one more adult limerick.
You hear about the dyslexic hooker?
For $5 she’ll duck your sick

 

There was a young man named Sweeney
Who spilled some gin on his weenie.
He thought this uncouth,
So he added vermouth,
And slipped his girl a martini.

 

OMG, that is so funny!
I'm lovin this!

 

Shaken not stirred she said,
Martini’s are best with a cherry that’s red.
She drank up the drink,
Then spit in the sink
Then told him no more til we are wed.

 

Ya'll got mad skillz Yo.

where is SS anyway? :?

 

omg, your the winner!
that is the funniest so far! :hurray:

 

I'm not that smart HG, but I can copy and paste :jester:

I haven't seen SS today. Maybe he can't come out and play with us today?

 

There once was a man named Screwy Dick,
A man who was born with a spiral pr**k.
His life was spent in one long hunt
to find the girl with the spiral cu*t.
When he found her he dropped dead,
'cause the bit*h had left hand thread!!!

 

THE OJ TRIAL AS TOLD BY DR. SUESS

I did not kill my lovely wife.
I did not slash her with a knife.
I did not bonk her on the head.
I did not know that she was dead.

I stayed at home that fateful night.
I took a cab, then took a flight.
The bag I had was just for me.
My bag. My bag. Hey, leave it be.

When I came home, I had a gash.
My hand was cut from broken glass.
I cut my hand on broken glass.
A broken glass did cause that gash.

I have nothing, nothing to hide.
My friend he took me for a ride.
Did you take this person's life?
Did you do it with a knife?

I did not do it with a knife.
I did not, could not kill my wife.
I did not do this awful crime.
I could not, would not anytime.

Did you hit her from above?
Did you drop this bloody glove?
I did not hit her from above.
I cannot even wear that glove.

I did not do it with a knife.
I did not, could not kill my wife.
I did not do this awful crime.
I could not, would not anytime.

And now I'm free, I can return
To my small house, for which I yearn,
And to family whom I love.
So now I'm free, give back my glove.

 

Did I miss something?

 

No, no, no! That was just a limerick I found and posted. It has nothing to do with our T4T.

 

Oh, thanks for clearing that up!! :lol::lol:

 

Once tough when hanging with Lee.
Now he uses a Depends for his pee.
To Ben Gay he’s no stranger,
Been using it since Ranger
Even Spock called him an Ancient Mystery.