Question about school disipline.

My son recently was out of school for having a severe tonsil abcess. On the returning day to school his third block class is PE and they had ran a mile outside he then came in and his throat was a little dry so he proceeded to walk towards the water fountain with the rest of the class. His teacher then came out of the class room and asked him where he was going and he told the teacher he was going to get water. The teacher then told my son he could not get water and my son told him to just write him up. My son proceeded to the water fountain and came back and the teacher yelled at him and my son yelled curse words towards the teacher. The teach knew that he was still feeling the symptoms of the sickness he had gotten over. My son also has ADHD and that morning I had forgotten to give him his medicine should he be punished for my wrong doing or should he not have any reperations?

Thanks for the help,
Jay.

 

JMHO - Regardless of the situation I think you're child should have asked or at the very least said, "hey teach, I really need some water." Kids shouldn't be leaving the classroom without the permission or knowledge of the teacher unless it's an EXTREME, "I'm gonna puke, etc" situation.

As far as the cursing at the teacher who IS an adult that he should be respectful towards ... not acceptable. Would you let him curse at you and get away with it?

 

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They were coming in from outside and he was with the rest of the class except he was behind them. My son and the teacher have had prior incidents leading up to this. And like I said my son has ADHD and he did not take his medicine and without it he is a completely different person. I'm just unsure that two days out of school is a bit to much.

 

Not for cursing at the teacher it isn't.

 

Cursing at the teacher has nothing to do with the ADHD does it? We have a child with ADHD and it doesn't make him curse at us or anyone.

 

If I were you I would be having this discussion with the principal if you think it's not fair. If he and the teach have had prior issues then I would address it.

I personally know many children with ADD and ADHD and yes they are very different without their medication, but cursing at an adult is about respect, which is controllable with or without meds.

 

Rather than bring your whining to a forum full of strangers, have you tried talking to the teacher?

ADHD is a crutch used by parents to excuse behavior they would rather not deal with. Does it really exist? Yes, probably. Is it a valid excuse for disrespecting those in authority? No, never.

 

Yes

Yes I know, I just don't know how long honestly I should ground him for. Because every time I ground him he does more and more to get in trouble. He is a perfect student and makes A's and B's but what I don't understand is how he does it without ever doing homework or cracking a book at home. He hates school with a passion and he skips all of the time. But when he does skip it is only his elective classes not his core classes such as English and what not. I've gotten reports on progress reports from teachers saying how he could be asleep in class and they would wake him up to answer a math problem and he would wake up and be able to do it in more than one way. But it just seems as though that when he doesn't take his medicine his anger problems come out more than when he is on it. The main reason he takes medicine is so it calms him from his anger problems. Insurance covers medicine not taking anger management classes. That is all out of pocket expenses.

 

:iagree:

Thanks for telling it like it is!!

 

Honestly and I AM NOT saying this to be mean or sarcastic. If this were my son I would be researching some nearby military schools for adolescents.

 

I'm not whining one bit, I am asking advice from other people that go through the same situations and live in the same community that I do. ADHD is not a crutch to excuse behavior. It is scientifically proven that ADHD is not only a problem it is somewhat a disease. if you see a kid with ADHD not on medicine please notice the constant movement with their eyes and hands, not to mention their mouths. It's a joy to have a kid with ADHD because they are full of life and a joy to be around. They can be happy but they can also be emotional unlike other kids that keep things balled up inside.

 

something smells fishy to me......

 

No offense but it sounds like he has more than ADHD if he takes meds to calm his anger. I don't think ADHD makes one angry or in need anger management, but I'm not a professional, just speaking from personal experience.

I stand corrected: (from the NAMI website) Nearly half of all children with ADHD (especially boys) tend to also have oppositional defiant disorder, characterized by negative, hostile, and defiant behavior. Conduct disorder (marked by aggression towards people and animals, destruction of property, deceitfulness or theft, and serious rule-breaking) is found to co-occur in an estimated 40 percent of children with ADHD.

 

Yes

You are right but he has been tested for being bipolar, the test were negative, but he is at a turning point in his life and he is 16 and at the age of trying to be a rebel. He is a great kid and he doesn't do anything towards anyone to offended them but sometimes it slips out on me and other people like his friends. He really isn't a trouble maker he might get in trouble once or twice a year for minor things and other than that his teachers say he is a good student. I'll probably allow him to do stuff once he returns back to school on Monday. As of now all he can do is talk on the phone and watch T.V. so I'm sure he will learn his lesson.

 

Doesn't sound like much of a punishment or disciplinary action to me. What 16yr old wouldn't be happy doing that all day? :lol:
If he's bored at school, have you considered Middle College?

 

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My son is 16 right now he was tested 2 months ago for it we do it every 6 months. Vivian I noticed your edit. I also read that as well it's not as though he is always angry it's just that he lets his anger build up because he doesn't like to talk about what bothers him but instead he lets it build up and finally he just lets go on someone. I think his medicine somewhat makes him not want to talk about it and me and my wife discused it with the doctor yesterday and we have changed his medicines now to see if it will better him in the long run.

 

Teens are not easy! I know that from experience too! LOL
That's rough when a child is off their meds and can't necessarily control their actions.

 

16 is old enough to start learning the responsibility of taking his medicine or reminding you to get it for him. If this is something he will have to do for the rest of his life he's not always going to have mom and dad to stay on top of him. It sounds like the suspension was warranted. There does seem to be more to it than he innocently tried to get a drink of water and the teacher went off on him. Still doesn't excuse his outburst and now the teacher is going to be even stricter with him if he/she thinks he is not going to follow the rules.

 

I know if I had ever cursed any adult as kid, I would not be here today. It would have been my last day on earth. I backed talk my Dad once, I couldn't sit or talk for several days. You have not done your job as a parent if your kid is cursing teachers, skipping school and doing whatever he wants. You have already lost him if he's that far gone. Military school might be your last option to save him.

 

My son hates to sit around all day he is an outside person and likes to be out hanging with his girlfriend at her house or ours. Middle college wouldn't look good on his college resume, I tried to get him to do it but he want's to go to a Four Year University and because a Lawyer or a Doctor. To him going to Middle College would make him seem like a "Screw up" and he had a friend that did it that got to the point where he finally just dropped out and my son wants to finish up highschool because all of his friends that go to college tell him how much better college is than highschool.