Please tell me....

I think that's the point of the last 2 post. There is NO reason most of the time. It just is what it is.

 

Yeah slamming wasn't good word choice on my part. Sorry!

 

Or you could have the parents who don't give a crap, never are involved, never attend / participate any school functions, don't help with homework, and make excuses all the time.......and the kids still turn out to be pretty successful ... it can happen, I know. :-(

 

When I was in school, we didn't have the kind of parent participation that there is today in schools. Parents came to open house, plays, concerts, etc. Things like that. I never had hardly any parents come in and volunteer in my classes and I attended private and public schools. I guess it's just changing times.

 

Cause I tried it and didn't care for the politics involved in it.
Sheri

 

So just because you may not see a parent at school, doesn't necessarily mean they aren't involved with their kid elsewhere. 8)[/QUOTE]

:iagree:

 

The percentage of that drops though with the lack of parental support. It obviously does happen that they fare good but its a uphill battle without parental support.

 

:iagree:[/quote]

yes true and that is great but isnt school the place parents should be most involved b/c that is where the majority of bad influence is and you dont know about it unless you try to find out.

 

:iagree: :iagree:

 

For starters, I was never involved in my kids schools Because that was my DOWN time. I don't send the kids to school to follow them, and they didn't want me there either. That was their time, and they wanted to come home and brag about school. I attended every school function they were in, they were heavily into sports (attended every game and practice) and helped on homework every nite. They even wanted to ride the bus, that was way cool. So I had my DOWN time everyday, and now I have two BACHELOR college Graduates who are very successful. SO, if people don't volunteer at school, that is Not for you to say and it doesn't make for a successful child. If you choose to volunteer, that is awesome of you, but don't slam people who don't.

 

yes true and that is great but isnt school the place parents should be most involved b/c that is where the majority of bad influence is and you dont know about it unless you try to find out.[/QUOTE]

Just cause I don't do the PTA, doesn't mean I don't what is going on at school. Everything else I'm involved in.
Sheri

 

I also wonder why parents who barely have $10.00 to their name keep having them. I can understand one or two, but I know a couple who now has 7 kids, and can't afford to pay attention. It's ridiculous. At some point you need to ask yourself if you're getting in above your head. In addition, I don't think it's all about parents just getting involved in school, but also providing discipline for their kids. Kids screaming in the stores or running around restaurants and doing nothing about it. No wonder why they think they can get away with anything

 

High cost of condoms?

 

When I was not attending schools on military bases or a NATO school my parents never attended a darn thing I did. I was on the high school volley ball team and we went all the way to State but my parents and most others never showed for a practice or game. Now, had we been in football and played on a Friday night I think it would have been different. I still remind my parents and they laugh. My dad was either gone to Vietnam, Korea to war or was doing some undercover stuff when in the states. My mom worked full time and went to class after work to get a degree. I'm a mutt. No wonder I protest.......just kidding. I really did understand then and now.

Single parent on my end:

1) Travel for work...in the past I have had to travel for weeks at a time and have felt bad when I missed a band concert or something. I always make sure to let my child, the coach/whomever and another parent know what is happening. It's amazing how it really does "Take A Village" as many parents have stepped up to the plate to help with mine. This would even include a dance recital that another father took my daughter too.

2) Sandwich Generation...We have three generations living under one roof now. I balance my time as best as I can. My mom has Alzheimer's, brain cancer and emphysema and cannot be left alone so it is a balancing act. I notify all teachers and coaches because if the coach keeps the kids late or lets them go early our schedule gets really messed up. Now that mine can drive it helps.

3) When I was in the corporate world I noticed that some parents were able to spend time at the child's school to help in all ways and could attend all functions. I felt that they and their children were closer than we were and that they received preferential treatment. Those were "feelings" but non the less I could not shake them. I spoke to several of those parents, some teachers and my child and found that my feelings were misplaced.

4) I'm way vocal (not that you guys didn't already know that) but those of us like this sometimes understand that things work out better if we do not attend. I realized it when I attended the discussions on school uniforms way back...sometimes my voice is not needed or wanted and things really will work out if I stay home.

5) I am lucky enough to have access to a computer and the internet at home. Each one of my teen's teachers and coaches are contacted by me no less than once a week to see how things are going and if I can be of assistance in any way. Recently I felt like my teen needed help with her study habits, which is strange because of past years, so I asked for a meeting with all teachers, my teen, counselors and anyone else that wanted to attend. When we were in the meeting the Math and English teachers were surprised at how my teen was struggling in AP Biology and AP U.S. History. We realized that she was "over studying" for Bio and kind of intimidated and bored in History. Once she talked to the history teacher, in the meeting, she felt better. He is a big guy and doesn't spice it up but has changed a little now. Both in Bio and History we found out that multiple choice tests messed her up so they changed tests plus told her to cover up the words and whatnots. Go off what you know it to be and not second guess. I am trying to say that sometimes we need to take the time to gather everyone together to see what is happening and how to fix it. In Math she was helping teach the class...now the teacher allows her to work on what my teen considers her "hard" subjects" when needed. The teen makes straight As in Math so that helps. The English teacher, who is just a gem, volunteered to stay after school and help my teen become more confident in those subjects she deems "hard".

6) Because most everyone knows our family they try to pick up the slack when I am not around. I really don't think they miss me when I cannot show up at the PTA meeting or whatever as they probably get out earlier. I ask questions because I want to fully understand (no shock to any of you). Even though I may not attend, in person, some functions I make sure to know what was on the agenda and have any points I deem vital addressed. Kind of behind the scenes.

The shame of it all is that our school systems and our children need as much good support as possible and they just don't get it all the time. My teen's class and even swim group have very active parents...almost to the point of overbearing. I've had teachers say they'll be glad when this group graduates. Not so much about the kids but the parents, as well. When the school has an orientation for our group the auditorium is filled to capacity with parents and kids. It's not like that for all grades but we all need to fill in and find that middle ground.

It's hard to be a grown up, :lol:
Sherry

 

Good one!
Sherry

 

i am NOT slamming, just asking.....i wanted to know why.

 

OK, I understand your point of view and I gave you my point of view. Sometimes what I didn't know didn't hurt me, and so I also had less worry. But I did have a very good understanding with my children and they could tell me anything, even the bad stuff. So I didn't have to be at school to know things. And I did have my share of going to the school alot and complaining of issues. My kids were brought up to know I had the upper hand and I didn't want to have any cops at my door because they would have to answer to me first. And so now they are grown and I am proud of them. And I do know they did stuff that I wouldn't have approved but kids will be kids, its just how far they take those wrong things and they knew when to stop. And they laugh back on their childhood now. And I am like, you did that? Oh my Gosh, if I had known

 

with all due respect.....things are way different now than when your kids were 13 and in middle school. middle school IS the new high school and kids can be horrible to each other and the teachers. i am 35 and did not hear about or see the things that happen in middle til i was in high school or out. i have good boys and i stay involved and aware......i worry about the kids whose parents are not aware of what their kids are doing b/c they could affect the rest of our kids.

 

Crazy,

I never took this Thread as you slamming or putting anyone down. I just read it and thought you were asking some questions that were on your mind. It never hurts to ask and to understand different reasons.

Disregard others and concentrate on what I think is a great topic.

Just my opinion,
Sherry