My neighbor is a cross dresser - at least

Discussion in 'Discussion Group' started by DontCareHowYouDoItInNY, Jun 3, 2009.

  1. DontCareHowYouDoItInNY

    DontCareHowYouDoItInNY Well-Known Member

    Are you an adult? Just wondering.
     
  2. crownsjo

    crownsjo Well-Known Member

    Yes.I am are you?
     
  3. DontCareHowYouDoItInNY

    DontCareHowYouDoItInNY Well-Known Member

    Yep - You have a stronger opinion regarding cross dressing than I do. That's fine, it's everyone's right to think for themselves. I'm not trying to tell you or anyone else what they should think. This is clearly topic that gets a wide range of opinions.
     
  4. crownsjo

    crownsjo Well-Known Member

    And So? I have the right to my opinion just like anyone here!! right? or wrong ?
     
  5. zookeeper

    zookeeper Well-Known Member

    Inconsiderate? Speaking from my personal experience, I can estimate that at least half my graduating class either saw, or heard the story about my mother (who was a serious alcoholic) falling flat on her face in the middle of everyone being called to accept their diploma. Being at the end of the alphabet sucks at times. :oops: My mother made scenes all throughout my life - 4H group, my First Communion, my 8th grade graduation, all of my sisters milestones as well. I lived in a huge home, all decked out with things that made friends ask for invites to check out that big built in pool. . .I lived with a freaking monster, who was also very likely bi-polar, but undiagnosed. . .she downed librium like they were candy, chased with scotch on the rocks. . .she was unpredictably violent with us kids. . .a REAL monster. . .and there were more than a few snickers, and remarks from the parents of my friends when they mentioned coming anywhere near my house. It wasn't a huge town at the time, and surely a good percentage of them knew all about my mother and her DWI and the circus that followed her accident. She didn't have an ounce of love for anyone, not even herself. That is the definition of inconsiderate, my friend.

    I truly believe I would be happy to have a cross-dressing parent who treated me with decency, in spite of any snickers, than the freak of nature that gave birth to me.
     
  6. DontCareHowYouDoItInNY

    DontCareHowYouDoItInNY Well-Known Member

    Absolutely - I stated that earlier - Your opinion is just as valid as mine. More so probably since I haven't taken as strong of a side as you. We may disagree, but that doesn't mean that one or the other is wrong.
     
  7. crownsjo

    crownsjo Well-Known Member

    thank you,,,toshay,,,my sp is wrong,but i think you know what i mean....
     
  8. GoWulfpack

    GoWulfpack Guest


    I bet you would hate both.
     
  9. zookeeper

    zookeeper Well-Known Member

    You don't know me at all.
     

  10. Being bi-polar is unfortunately not a choice. Changing your sex or crossdressing is. My step-daugter's mom is severly bi-polar so I know a lot about it. One thing for sure is her mother did not choose to be bi-polar. It makes a difference when you make a conscious decision that will affect your family's lives.
     
  11. seabee

    seabee Guest

    yes with that but not with the alcohol... which appears to be more of the contributing factor unless bi-polar came into play with the alcohol problem.. A true mess none the less.. You can look at the positive Zoo in the big picture and ask yourself.. has it made you to be a more loving and caring parent and person as you've grown. I sense it has.. Many times a lot of good often comes out of a bad situation, it all depends how one chooses to learn from it.

    My heart goes out to you and that story Zoo... :grouphug:
     
  12. zookeeper

    zookeeper Well-Known Member

    Sorry about your daughters' condition

    While my mother did not choose to be bi-polar - she did make the choice to go to three different doctors (back in the 60's when 'mother's little helpers' were dispensed freely) and get Rx for "tranquilizers" to chase with scotch - which she drank at least a fifth a day - sincerely - more than most men could handle - but she had 30 years to build up a resistance to the stuff. She self medicated, she refused help even after being carted away to a state hospital in a straight jacket. She came out two months later clean and sober and made the decision to find booze and drink again. She was given lots of help, and stayed in denial - sure you can say alcoholism is a disease. . .so I guess she was just plain diseased and I should excuse it - so be it.

    I lived with a dangerous woman and no one ever gave a damn - not one person ever stepped forward to see if the kids were okay even though it was evident we were not. People stick their noses in things that really shouldn't concern them and almost get whiplash trying to avoid the circumstances where they should.


    How do you know that whatever makes a cross dresser do what they do isn't triggered by some 'disease' something in their brain, which makes it just as impossible for them resist, as the drink to the alcoholic, or the pill to the druggie?

    All I can say is to each his own - his family can choose how they deal with it.
     
  13. VolleyGirl

    VolleyGirl Guest

    It sounds like your mother was very sick and as a result was not a good mother. I am SO sorry she did not have the right treatment (which is so much better these days of course from knowing more about bipolar, alcoholism etc.) and you felt the effects of that. I can most certainly see your point that a loving parent is what makes the difference - not whether they started out a male and changed to female or visa versa. :grouphug:
     
  14. zookeeper

    zookeeper Well-Known Member


    It made me someone who didn't have children, but had critters instead. Sleeping with dogs on your bed kept you safe at night, if someone came into your room, the dogs would hear it. I felt the safest with those dogs, I guess that's why I work with them as a profession. Us kids, we all slept with baseball bats or batons under our beds, we had deep concerns she might kill us in our sleep. Oddly, I married someone with an alcohol problem because somewhere in my sick mind I thought I could "fix" him - :neutral: - yeah right. . .but at AL-ANON meetings I learned that lots of children of alcoholics do this - if they don't turn into alcoholics themselves. . .

    Sure, the alcohol intensified my mothers' negative behavior, probably 10 fold - she was one scary individual who could be smiling at you one moment and chasing you with a knife the next, with no provocation.

    I do worry at times whether I might have a little of her in me, some of that craziness that's just waiting to rear it's ugly head. I know my siblings have wondered the same thing. From what we gathered from family members who spoke a little, her symptoms began to show after her first pregnancy - sort of like post-partum that lasted 25 years. . .needless to say, my mother only got one grandchild and he wasn't planned (very much loved, but definitely not planned)
     
  15. zookeeper

    zookeeper Well-Known Member

    Thanks for the couch time 4042-ers. Good therapy.

    Off to bed, long day tomorrow.
     
  16. kdc1970

    kdc1970 Guest

    Zoo, you are a brave woman to share that with us. I mean this from the bottom of my heart. :grouphug:
     
  17. GoWulfpack

    GoWulfpack Guest

    No I don't.....but most humans would struggle with both issues.
     
  18. :iagree:
     
  19. Hught

    Hught Well-Known Member

    I agree wholeheartedly about the bi-polar aspect, and there is medicine to help with that for some fortunate individuals. My understanding is that some individuals also have a wiring issue when it comes to their sexuality and some take steps to deal with it. I don't see a difference and I wish individuals with either of these issues the best.
     
  20. seabee

    seabee Guest



    Ok.. I would be a good candidate for the "you don't know me" phrase you threw down on Wulfster.... :grouphug:
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 5, 2009

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