Something happened at work last week that got me thinking about decisions in my life that I would change if I could go back in time. The thought kept coming back to me all weekend and this morning I finally hit upon the exact moment I would go back and change. Bare with me, I think you'll find this an interesting topic. A lot of things came to mind as I was thinking about this. I came into a fairly large sum of money 15 years ago and basically peed it away. I had a job about that same time that I was very good at, but got mad at the boss and left. Had I stayed with it, I have no doubt that I would be in upper management by now making well into the six figure range. I won't go into great detail about the incident at work that brought this all back to me, but a series of seemingly harmless statements and insignificant events led to a top producer in our company being transferred against his will. He went to the President’s office madder that a wet hornet, but luckily I was able to head him off and tell him this story before he got there... I was in the sales department in a very large company. I worked hard, and I became very good, very quickly, but very young. I was recognized time and time again as being one of the top 5 producers in the company, and this was over a two year period. So, at about the two year mark upper management began talking about me taking over my own branch. The rumor mill cranked up, and my branch manager, who was not a very friendly guy, took me under his wing and started showing me the reports and paperwork I'd need to know when I got the manager’s job. Not IF, but WHEN. So this situation goes on for a few months and I start getting antsy. In sales sometimes what make you good also make you a pain in the butt. One day the President of the company summons my boss and me to HQ for a meeting. We go in and it's him, the Sr. Vice Pres, and my regional manager. I just know that this is the day I was getting my branch!! That's where my downfall began... The meeting started out very businesslike, but soon turned into five guys laughing and joking around like old friends. Then the President stood up, put his hand in his pocket, walked over to me and said, "Well I've got something here in my pocket, and I think you'll be very happy about it." That, my friends, was the last nice thing the guy said to me. Why? Because my smart-alek mouth over rode my brain, and I said in what I thought was a joking tone "Damn, it must be a small branch to fit in your pocket like that". Everyone stopped laughing, and I could see the president’s smile turned to a tight lipped frown. He said "Well, maybe you'd rather have that then this bonus check I have for you". He then pulled out a very handsome bonus check. I took it, thanked him, and my boss got me out of there ASAP. The whole way back to our branch he told me how stupid I was for saying that. Well I got my own branch a few weeks later. It was a crappy little branch in a crappy little town that hadn't made its goal in two years. Basically I went from the top branch in the entire Southwest region to the worst branch in Arizona. It was an absolute nightmare! I was working 13 hour days and my marriage suffered horribly (credit to my wife for staying with me). I couldn't turn things around, so after 12 months I was put back down to a sales position in another branch and left the company a short time later. I was terribly embarrassed to have fallen so far in such a short time, and my professional life went into a tailspin for a very long time. In some ways, it never recovered. If I could go back in time, it would be to that meeting. I’d keep my mouth shut, graciously accept the bonus check, and waited my turn to take a branch. SO I'm curious...is there a single moment in your life that you'd go back and change if you could?
I've thought about this type of opportunity myself...and yes, I have a quite a few things on the list that I wish I'd done differently. If you change just one little thing about the way you did something in the past, how will it affect your life, good and bad, in the future? If we have that opportunity to change one thing, how do we know if a seemingly better choice would have resulted in a tragic outcome? I think we all can think back and want to kick ourselves in the butt for the way we did something...that jury in our head keeps reminding us of past choices. I pretty much have resigned myself to the fact that "it is what it is" and I definitely have learned by those past mistakes, which is a positive outcome.
I don't know that I would necessarily go back and change anything. If I had, then I wouldn't have the life I have now. It might not be 100% perfect...........but I wouldn't change it. Well, maybe I would have played the lottery more. 8)
Yes, there is at least one aspect of life I'd probably change. That said, however, I'm thankful for where I'm at and give God credit for carrying me, taking no credit for myself. I think we serve ourselves best when not reflecting on things we cannot go back and change, but simply look forward to the opportunities that we have in front of us and learning from our pasts. Still, I am a firm believer in what Christ stated in that we should not worry and toil for tomorrow, but rather be content with having today. As a Christian, I place my hopes on my Heavenly Father as any young child looks to their father and I am supplied with what I need and graciously accept it. Therefore, the past is just that and we have no promise of tomorrow, so we can either enjoy our day or wallow in self-pity or suffer low self-esteem over things that we cannot change. We are who we are at this moment and we should not allow circumstances (past or present) to shape us.
Yes, the most often considered thing that I've thought about changed my life. And if I could, I don't think that I'd go back and not make the choice I made. had I done so, there's no guarantee that things would have worked out as they did, and what I'm now enjoying may not have happened. I'm referring to breaking up, back in the day, with the LOML. We allowed Life to intervene. Took us 27 years to find our way back to each other. No doubt, that period of change, experiences etc made us the people we are today. Even had we not broken up, there's no guarantee that we'd have made it, and it's whimsy to think so. Would I be the person I am, had I not made the choices I'd made in the intervening period? No. Am I happy the way things have worked out? I can only say that, even considering the mistakes I've made along the way, and how things worked out for me, that I am the happiest I've ever been. That feeling of fulfillment and happiness I attribute to finding my way back to my LOML. I am the lucky one.
I'm going to have to think about this. Sharing mine always makes me feel as though I'll never find that same guy again. Sherry
If I could go back in time and B**ch slap my self for ever saying it would be shortly after I got married I said the following to my wife: "Lana you talk to your mom everyday on the phone, Why don't you just ask her if she wants to move in with us". The old bat did and with in 6 months we were separated. Found out afterwards my wife had also started cheating on me.
