:iagree: The "adults" in her life assume she is an adult too. How sad. She has a long, hard road in front of her.
Her dad (my brother) and her mom divorced about 5 years or so ago. She lives with her mom. Her mom is a drunk and on drugs. She tries to be my niece's "friend" more than she tries to be her MOM. My brother would never punish or spank the girls when they needed it because he was afraid their mother would keep them from him. She won't even go see her dad AND she calls him by his name. Last time she saw her dad was Father's Day after not having seen him in TWO months. He couldn't make her go on vaca with us bc she told her mother she didn't want to go bc her boyfriend couldn't go, so she didn't make her. I swear, if I EVER, EVER see her "mother" in public, I WILL give her a piece of my mind.
So why doesnt he take her back to court for full custody.. that along with her allowing the dd's bf to stay the night should be enough to gain custody..
14 is absolutley without a doubt too young. I got married at 20 and it did "take", but I am well aware that is a statistical anomaly. We will have our 21st annivesary in Dec. With that said, if my son pops up wanting to get married that young, I will not be encouraging it. It's hard work sometimes and people change a lot in their 20's to be sure.
Did I call it or what? CPS will investigate for free... No money or can't prove it are lame excuses, unless he wants to be Grampa Firstname.
Calling CPS won't do any good. I know the kind of person she is...she will lie through her teeth, take out anything in her house that would be used against her, and have her friends lie for her. I, myself, am considering following her and taking pics of her at the drug dealers house.
Hahaha....If you only knew!!! I tell ya, when you're the Christian you claim to be, the devil sure loves to mess with you!
CPS doesn't call and make an appt, the cops don't either. I just see alot excuses here. Does your brother want to save his little girl, or just sit around and talk about it?
So he's willing to risk his daughter's life and well-being because he has no evidence? This sounds bizarre to me. Could it be that the real issue is being avoided? Maybe there is a reason he doesn't want full custody of his daughter that has nothing to do with finances or providing evidence. It's probably a reason he doesn't want to be honest about. Parents that care usually do what it takes to rescue their child from a harmful situation. Does he have a drug or alcohol problem as well?
No. He does care. There are no excuses being made here. He just absolutely does not have the evidence or the finances. He and I have talked about this many times. He's working just to pay his child support. He can't afford a lawyer.
I understand his situation. What he needs is hard evidence to show the court and that can only be obtained in certain ways. A private investigator costs A LOT of money and I have no idea whether a court accepts photos/video that is taken by just anyone. What he needs to do ASAP is like Cleo suggested call the local law enforcement and ask to have a call to check on the welfare of his daughter. He can explain that he believes there are drugs in the house. He should not tell anyone that he is going to do it or when he is calling so that she doesn't have an opportunity to hide anything. I have no idea how CPS works in terms of when he calls how fast someone can get out there to do a check. His ex may refuse to let them look around the house, which isn't going to look good for her. Anyway, this is all free and IMO the best option for him right now. He also needs to contact legal aid and discuss the situation with them if he really can't afford an attorney. http://www.legalaidnc.org/ If the cops do find something and remove his daughter from the home and he is granted emergency custody he is still probably going to have to go over the hurdle of having an attorney work out the permanent long-term custody situation. So no matter how you cut the cake he is going to need an attorney and those cost money! That's reality and just because he can't afford one doesn't make him a bad parent. I understand how frustrating it probably is for him to feel like he can't do anything because he can't afford a PI or an attorney. But there are at least some things that he can do that aren't going to cost him and he needs to get on it. Otherwise he is going to look like he doesn't care all that much. I feel for him because custody situations are rough feeling like you have no control over a situation and have to sit back and watch and be expected to accept a crappy situation. But if the danger is real he needs to act. He also needs to prove it. You can't just kidnap your child if you have a court order in place with regard to custody. You have to do everything the right way so you don't end up looking as bad as the offending parent. In short :lol:, he needs to call the cops and have them stop by unannounced to check on your daughter regarding the drugs. It's a crappy situation and there is not going to be an easy, simple, overnight fix.
