So we have a very minor issue with DS, but one that does need addressing. He's one of those kids who sometimes doesn't give an assignment his best effort, does just enough to get by. He's blessed that he gets excellent grades without a lot of effort on his part. However, he could be off the charts if he would just apply himself. I know, I shouldn't complain, but it's something that I've noticed as well as his teacher. What do you do to get your kid to give that extra effort? I've talked to him about it, his teacher has, etc. but not getting much out of that. It's a double edged sword, because my parents made such a huge deal out of grades (I would be punished for anything less than straight A's) I am afraid to put too much pressure on him, don't want it to backfire, ya know? What's a happy medium? Why don't kids come with manuals??:?
:allears: I have the same problem with ds2. Along with his report card they sent a small piece of paper that said he got an "N" in media... in library! How do you get an N in library?! He got A's and B's with one C but it was the N that threw me. Actually, I was pleasantly surprised at his grades... but that N...
We have that problem too. Seems to definitely be worse with boys. He will do better if I help him a little to get him started, especially with studying for tests or projects. Our problem is mainly the transistion to middle school and hopefully once that settles down, things will get better. We have had issues we have never encountered before this year. All I can say is hold on and enjoy the ride!!!
I've thought about this alot because growing up I was always a real motivated kid academically. I loved school. I didn't even understand doing something just to get by (until college :lol: - I kind of slacked off then). Here's the thing. My brother was the complete opposite. He was smart, but hated school. He only liked the social aspect of school. We were raised in the same house with the same parents and got the same amount of encouragement. My parents hired tutors for him and spent so much time with him, even trying to motivate him with rewards. I think different kids have different views of school and different times in their lives when they are motivated. My brother never wanted to go to college, and I did. Right after high school, he started working full-time with my dad, and he still does that today, and is a hard worker and very successful. Now that we're adults we're both doing what we love. I think if you give it time, you never know what will happen. Your son might even become more motivated as he gets older, depending on his goals. If his dream is to be a doctor or an engineer and he knows he has to go to college for that, maybe he will become more motivated later. I think motivation changes with the seasons. I was very motivated and focused in elementary through high school because my goal was to go to college, but I wasn't a real motivated college student the first time around because I wasn't focusing on any other goal than getting out of school! I didn't have a particular career in mind. Now that I'm back in school and working towards what I really love and want to be, I'm much more motivated and I'm much better grades than I did when I was younger. There is hope for your son no matter what.
I have two too. And they are boys. It's very frustrating!!! So if anyone has a magic solution, I am all ears... seems like the older they get, the worse....
KDC - I'm in a similar situation. My son's report card wasn't quite what we were hoping for, but not really unexpected after seeing his teacher recently. He is very bright, but is just lazy when it comes to schoolwork/homework. He doesn't want to write in complete sentences (he's in 4th grade), and doesn't even read the directions half the time to do the work properly. He rushes through tests in class, and then gets half the answers wrong. But if you ask him the same questions, he knows the answers. He's just lazy, really. It's very frustrating, especially when you know he knows the work, just doesn't apply himself! We're offering him an incentive for the next 9 weeks. If he gets all As and Bs (no C's), he gets to do something special with his BFF. We're going to determine what it is, maybe the monster truck jam or a movie and dinner night out or go-karting, something he doesn't get to do often. Fortunately I think most of the problem with his grades happened in the first month of school, his meds were off (ADHD) and he just wasn't wanting to do anything and was getting very frustrated. But he's been much better with doing his homework, sometimes even starting in school, and I make sure I always check it before he goes to school. His teacher is also going to try something in school to help get him to apply himself better. Kind of like a small reward system for doing the minor things like organization, note-taking, taking his time, things like that. Good luck!
I'm trying to think of something like that. But honestly, the kid had all A's and one B (which if he'd pay attention, would have been an A as well). I can't complain!!! What he's slacking on is the extra AIG classroom stuff (he doesn't go to Smithfield). He just doesn't care. Which is fine in the grand scheme of things. I don't want it to be all about the grades, but on the other hand, he could be a real stand-out if he's just give it a littel "oomph" ya know? But I realize it has to come from him, not me. It's his life, not mine. I guess a little reward of some sort might help. Can't hurt to try the rest of the year and see. See, I feel bad for even thinking this is a problem.
Bribery. Say, ten bucks for each A on the report card. I too have a kid that could pull all A's if he WANTED to, but he is happy to get by - esp now that he is in HS and has school sports. I am fine with B's but I let him know that C's are unacceptable and that I know he is not applying himself. At the first inkling of a C or not completing classwork/homework the cable and the PS2 come out of his bedroom, no internet on school nights, and he gets them back when is grade goes up.
that's exactly the case with my two....especially when they bring home a C that is one or two points from being a B and I look on the report card and see a missed homework assignment that didn't get turned in on time, or something else equally as lame. So frustrating....so I take things away till morale improves...
My son has about 5 tests per week. My wife has a deal with him that he gets a dollar for each A and .50 for each B on those weekly tests. This gives him some spending money at the end of the week for our trip to the store.
My son was in the AIG program also and I struggled for years as to why he was so smart but did not do the work, honestly when I took him out of the honors program this year, his grades went from C's and D's (keep in mind his IQ is off the charts) his grades are now A's and one B. He is ADHD and so intelligent it scares me, 15 in the 10th grade too. Good luck and I hope you find the 'AHA' moment for your DS.:lol:
My son made honor roll and I know what a lot of his incentive is......he gets a toy at report card time (nothing too pricey, he got a tech deck ramp and some of the tech deck boards) if he brings home good grades. School is so much harder than in our day and the day is longer also. I feel like kids could use a little incentive. JMHO but it works for us as he was honor roll 3x last year with the same reward system in place.
Kyle was the same way. His teachers and I use to get so frustrated because he did just enough to get by and that was it. I was told by his teachers that he was smarter than he let on, but for him, it was just laziness and he honestly thought he was not as smart as the other kids. We thought that maybe he was bored with what he was learning, which can cause a child to not get as good of grades as they usually would, and we wanted to see if he could test out of some of his courses, but he wouldn't let us do that for him. He told us he would fail on purpose so he would not have to advance a grade. I think he didn't want to be treated like a "brain", who knows. It is frustrating when you know your kids can do better than they are.
