MAMMOGRAMS Many women are anxious about mammograms, but there is no need to worry. By taking a few minutes each day for a week preceding the exam and doing the following exercises, you will be totally prepared for the test and best of all, you can do these simple exercises right in and around your home. EXERCISE ONE: Open your refrigerator door and insert one breast in door. Shut the door as hard as possible and lean on the door for good measure. Hold that position for five seconds. Repeat again in case the first time wasn't effective enough. EXERCISE TWO: Visit your garage at 3AM when the temperature of the cement floor is just perfect. Take off all your clothes and lie comfortably on the floor with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car. Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until your breast is sufficiently flattened and chilled. Turn over and repeat with the other breast. EXERCISE THREE: Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Press the bookends against one of your breasts. Smash the bookends together as hard as you can. Set up an appointment with the stranger to meet next year and do it again. YOU ARE TOTALLY PREPARED! AND, just a thought for all the women out there........ MENtal illness, MENstrual cramps, MENtal breakdown, MENopause............ Ever notice how all of women's problems start with men?.........And When we have real trouble it's HISterectomy!!!! :lol::lol::lol:
:lol: :lol: Woman(wo man)is on a roll God said this creature will cause Man WOE,so we'll call her Woman :-D
:lol: I've heard that one several times before but it still makes me LOL to read it, especially now I've had one before. Oh geeze, that reminds me... that I'm due for another one this year. :neutral: (Guess reminding me to schedule one could count as public service number two for you Kaci. )
If anyone needs help with this I have this really neat pair of X-ray specs I got out of a comic book when I was younger. They are a bit old so they are limited in the ability to penetrate to any depth so for the best results you really should be naked ..... Call BR-549 any time ... :mrgreen:
