SIL's dog died... what's the appropriate etiquette?

Discussion in 'Discussion Group' started by Crysta, May 14, 2009.

  1. Crysta

    Crysta Guest

    They had to put down SIL/BIL's dog today. He's been with them for almost 8 years, and lived a long life (they adopted him and his partner at the pound when they were already a few years old).

    So now I don't know what to do for them. They are of course devistated. What's the appropriate ettiquette in this situation? I can't bake/cook them anything, as they know better than to eat anything I've created. Should I send flowers? A card? Food? A puppy?
     
  2. Melynda

    Melynda Well-Known Member

    Did they leave their dog with the vet, have him cremated or bring him home for burial? If he was cremated, maybe you can purchase some tiny locket or tiny, locket sized chest to put a bit of the ashes in? When our Rottie passes, we buried him in the back yard. We planted a Crepe Myrtle over him. He was always horrible about lying in the flower beds so we planted a flower bed around the Crepe Myrtle? Maybe a plant? Honestly, a big "hug" may be all they really need :cry:
     
  3. Emma Caroline

    Emma Caroline Well-Known Member

    I would send a card--they make them for loss of pets. You may also want to make a donations to the SPCA, JCAPL or something in memory of their pet.
     
  4. crunchymom

    crunchymom Well-Known Member

    I don't think I'd buy them a new puppy... it's probably too soon. They probably want to remember & mourn their dog right now.
     
  5. VolleyGirl

    VolleyGirl Guest

    Flowers, a card, a donation in his/her memory are all great ideas. I lost my beloved Boomer this year and I appreciated the sweet cards that I got after it.
     
  6. AnnetteL

    AnnetteL Well-Known Member

    :iagree:
    and I also agree about not getting them another puppy right away,when our little dog passed away it would have felt like being disloyal to him to get a replacement so soon. Off course we also still had his little sister at the time,she is 10 now and I'm already dreading the day...whenever that day may come we already decided not to get another one after her,she's such a huge part of our lives and getting another one just would not feel right, to us anyway.We would want another "her" but since that would not be possible (and I'm not about to clone her) and since it also would not be fair to the next dog to be expecting him or her to be like this one...if that makes any sense:?
     
  7. Crysta

    Crysta Guest

    Thanks all! I just wanted to make sure that she knows that we understand that this was a member of her family and not a goldfish from the fair that had to get flushed down the toilet or something. The poor dog deserves some recognition too. But I've never known anyone who's dog died, and I don't want to offend them or anything. And I wasn't sure if getting a card would make it seem like I wasn't taking it seriously, if that makes any sense.

    BTW, the puppy was a joke. If you've ever seen the Ron White skit where his wife's dog dies and he gets her a new puppy and it heals her heart. :)
     
  8. Wayne Stollings

    Wayne Stollings Well-Known Member

    Some friends of ours lost their greyhound to bone cancer and we bought a small garden statue of a dog with angle wings engraved with the dog's name as a rememberence for them.
     
  9. Wayne Stollings

    Wayne Stollings Well-Known Member

    We have one of them for a cat and a dog ourselves and will have more in the future as we still have two of each.
     
  10. ForeverFaithful

    ForeverFaithful Well-Known Member

    When I lost one of my dogs back in 2000, someone sent me a card, but wrote it out as if it were from the dog I lost. It was so nice and it brought tears to my eyes, but it meant a lot to me. It talked about the love I gave her and how much she loved me and mentioned special moments.

    Also, maybe a collage of pictures like from the time they brought it home, until recent.
     
  11. Jester

    Jester Well-Known Member

    Etiquette? I loved my childhood dog that I had for 12 years, but I didn't need any cards, baked goods, or anything else to help me through it. I would have been fine with just a "sorry about your dog" type of response and left it be.
     
  12. kdc1970

    kdc1970 Guest

    Some folks take it harder than others. Doesn't make it "right" or "wrong" just different.
     
  13. VolleyGirl

    VolleyGirl Guest

    :iagree: [I keep agreeing with everything I have read you say tonight so I'm gonna go watch the hockey game and let you hold down the fort since you've got it covered.] :cheers:
     
  14. kdc1970

    kdc1970 Guest

    LOL! I'm actually going up to watch TV too, was sitting here on the laptop while DS did homework. :cheers:
     
  15. Jester

    Jester Well-Known Member

    I wasn't really belittling anybody for bereavement after the passing of a pet, but mostly implying that perhaps it could be entirely adequate just to say you're sorry about the passing of the dog and move on.
     
  16. PirateGirl

    PirateGirl Well-Known Member

    When my Elvis died, his doctor sent beautiful flowers to us with a great card. They also gave us 2 books about dogs, heaven, and guardian angels. One of the books had something written personally from everyone there. It was touching. I received several cards from family and friends as well as lots of phone calls. He was my baby boy.
     
  17. seabee

    seabee Guest

    8)8) A nice card is a good thing to do...
     
  18. dangerboy

    dangerboy Well-Known Member

    you can get a rememberance brick placed in the walkway at the vet school hospital with the pet's name and dates or whatever for a donation to the vet school...
     
  19. harleygirl

    harleygirl Well-Known Member

    [​IMG]


    I sport this necklace everyday, it has Shelby's ashes in it. I get to keep her close to me everyday and she protects me, like she always did.

    I think a card would be nice for your SIL/BIL. I'm so very sorry for them, my heart breaks. :cry::cry::cry:
     
  20. seabee

    seabee Guest


    So sweet... :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:
     

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