Just to clarify, i was not insinuating anyone on here smothers their kids. My post came from experience raising 3, and thank God they all did turn out to be great adults, but trust me, i did make mistakes along the way and had to learn from them. If there were a perfect way to raise your kids or a one shoe fits all way, wouldn't that make life so much easier? i wish you all so much luck in raising your kids, it is the toughest job any of us will ever face in life and i am relieved it is pretty much over for me :lol:
Yes it would but then there'd be a ton of people who still wouldn't do their job! Ya'll have a great weekend!
TRust a teenager? No.... always be a step ahead of them. Mine is very trustworthy and sweet but I give kiddo Zero opportunities to screw up her life. yes I am over protective in some ways but hey- I'd rather err on the side of caution then be relaxed and have a grandchild. Mine knows i'll kick her butt from one end of Cleveland to the other if she ever did that. And I have instilled in her that to have a baby at such a young age is going to ruin her life and her chanes of succeeding in areas she wants to excel in. MY neighbor took the - well they will do it any way - attitude and allowed the boyfriend to move in.. she is now expecting her second grandchild from her seventeen year old, unmarried daughter.....
I can say my 18 year old is doing fine. She's graduating this year and going to college next year. It's hard even when you think you're doing what you think is right. All I can say is communication is important. Good luck.
Some of the things I overhear when middle school kids are talking make me just blush. I have taken a note before where the boyfriend came in the widow and he and the girl did it while the mom was home. How do you tell a parent about that? I just handed the note over to the assistant principal and let him handle it. If kids make that decision, they'll find a way to do it. They can tell you they are going to Suzy's house, or spending the night with Mark, but you can't know for sure where they have gone. Parties are the worst places for self-destructive behavior. I just wish I understood what allows them make that decision. I've known some "nice" kids (churchgoing, well-behaved, good school habits) who have gone down that road...it's not just the trouble-makers. My personal kids are like yours, Jen, they think it's all kinda' eww, but many of them out there get these ideas way too early.
In my opinion when kids get up to an age of 15 they don't need to be sheltered from the elements but should know the difference from right and wrong. They should also know what consequence of their actions are. I think our younger generation get conflicting signals from we as adults. Sorry to say but accountability has gone right out the window. Many of todays adults fail to be accountable for their own actions. People seem to think they can do what ever they want and find a scapegoat. Just like when some high school boys began to start some trouble with a neighbor of mine at 1 am in the morning by banging on his door. When my neighbor went to the the parent she said, "Boys will be boys"! I remember when I was a kid and doing some other than nice things to my neighbors thinking it was fun. Well not only did I get my butt kicked by my neighbor but I also got dragged by him back to my house and got my butt kicked by my parents. Kids today really don't have the fear of consequence in them because they know that their parents will shield them by creating excuses for them. My comments pertains to some but not all....
I think part of the problem too is that neighbors, (adult) friends, school staff etc sometimes are hesitant to get involved because you never know what kind of response/reaction you'll receive from the parents. Some parents want to know and will handle the situation...others...well we know how some people behave! I've had situations where the parents brought to my attention when they saw my children doing things they shouldn't. Whether it was something that I felt needed punishment or not, I still appreciated knowing what they were up to! And it made them realize that just because I didn't see it that others parents felt it was wrong or inappropriate too (not just me).
parenting is never easy...and while ROBO and I are divorced somehow we've worked issues out with our children together. We don't always see eye to eye but do what we believe is best for our son who lives with him and our daughter who lives with me.
