When I lived in Florida I had sold knock down furniture. The same kind of crap you see at Wal Mart. A couple came in to buy a table and chairs. While showing them what kind of stuff we had and just chatting, the husband had told me that for that past Christmas his grandmother had given them a thing of KY jelly. G_ds honest truth. If I had not heard it myself I would not of believed it.
Quick thinking on your end. When younger I had a few friends over and when leaving one stated, loudly, I cannot find my roach clip. My mother yelled "we have roaches"? My dad rolled his eyes, looked at me and stated to my mother..."no, but I smell a rat". Sherry
Worst Gift Given: First year married and my husband and I are going to spend the holiday with his family. We fly from San Francisco to Boca where his family picks us up. This is my first time meeting his family. Of course, I told my family where we were spending the holidays. The day after arriving his family and friends gather to meet the new bride and all and the doorbell rings. The delivery man hands a package over to my mother-in-law and she is excited as it is from my family. Everyone gathers around while she opens it and once she finally gets the box open everyone moans. I moved closer wondering what was wrong and saw the wonderful Honey Baked Ham...oops...they are Jewish, celebrating Hanukkah and do not eat pork. New wife flunks initial meeting! Worst Gift Received: So, now you know that we have ham in this kosher house. Later in the day I am wandering around and I hear someone saying "psst, psst, psst". I realize it is my father-in-law and walk over to him. Once I arrive he grabs my arm, pulls me into a room, closes the door and locks it. As the sweat pours down my forehead, my father-in-law hands me a box and in it are slices of ham, white bread and mayo (all a no no in this house). He tells me to go into a certain room and make myself a sandwich and enjoy. He also instructs me to lock the door and not tell anyone. Relief on my end. I follow the instructions. The sandwich is made and bite in...a knock at the door and then a key turning the door knob...my mother-in-law opens the door to find me eating all of this and my mouth was full. I could have died. She directs me to the kitchen table where everyone starts laughing because my father-in-law told them what he was doing and that they were to allow me to eat what I wanted. I started to cry and then laugh and had not swallowed the food...needless to say I was cleaning up pork items for a while...while everyone tried to make nice. Lesson learned: Know the customs before acting. I have a bunch of funny stories of this quality regarding this husband. Funerals are way different and sometime I will let you guys know what not to do at a Jewish funeral. Funny now! Sherry
